Short Pier Productions proudly presents
NORMAL VIEW VI:
VIEW OR DIE
March 30 - April 1, 2007
Ladies and gentlemen, we are at war-- a war for the very
standards of entertainment. Our enemies are well-armed with
sequels, remakes, and mindless comedies. They think to bury
us in tripe, to force-feed it to us until we submit. And
they are winning. Intelligent men and women are buying
tickets for Norbit, because they have forgotten how to
I say it is time for them to remember. I say it is time for
us to fight back. I say it is time... to heckle.
NORMALVIEW 6: VIEW OR DIE
Short Pier Productions proudly presents the sixth
installment of NormalView, our very own bad movie festival
in the style of Mystery Science Theater. Come watch some of
the very worst movies of all time with us--and make fun of
them. The whole audience will be participating in this
uncensored, unscripted, totally improvised heckle-fest.
All films will be shown in room 4405 on the fourth floor of
Siebel Center. The building is located at 201 N. Goodwin
Avenue in Urbana, only one building down from a convenient
parking lot. You can bring food as long as you clean up
after yourself, and caffeine is strongly recommended.
- Friday, March 30th
- 7:00 PM: Dinosaurus!
- Answering the long-held evolutionary question of
who would win in a fight: rubbery plasticine
dinosaurs or woodenly acted racial stereotypes?
Comedic interludes will be cheerfully provided by
a caveman in a dress.
- 9:00 PM: Stealth
- Someone obviously decided to try and combine
2001: A Space Odyssey, Top Gun, and Beach Blanket
Bingo. I'll give you three guesses what happens
to the black guy.
- Saturday, March 31st
- 1:00 PM: Saturday Afternoon Cartoons: Psychic Force & Panzer Dragoon
- Once again poaching shamelessly from NormalView:
Anime Edition, we bring you Panzer Dragoon and
Psychic Force-- anime so bad the IMDB doesn't
list them. They're both based on video games.
Need I say more?
- 3:00 PM: Awfully 80s: Teen Witch
- Way back in NormalView 2, we showed Breakin' 2:
Electric Boogaloo. Since then, I've had many
requests to show more tragically dated movies
from the 80s, but I made a vow never to play
another one until I found one that could actually
compete in this festival on its own merits.
Finally, four years later, I found one. Watch it
- 7:00 PM: Druids
- Based on a true story! This really happened to
Christopher Lambert. Only the mustaches have been
changed to protect the innocent.
- 9:30 PM: Golden Munchie Classic: Battlefield Earth
- I received a call recently from the
scientologists saying that I should only put nice
things in this review. John Travolta was very
- Sunday, April 1st
- 1:00 PM: Viewer's Choice
- Proof that democracy works: you bring your own
movies and pick the worst one to sit through.
Feels like the 2008 election already.
- The Viewer's Choice was...a movie we can't really mention here. Let's
just say that it proved the old adage - "there should have been only one."
The management has also arranged entertainment for between
movies this year, including several bad movie card games
and at least one bad video game. Feel free to bring your
own bad video games (and the systems to play them) to
inflict on everyone else!